I often wonder how my life would have turned out if I made different choices. If I had worked at a different store when I was 16, if I had actually saved money for my own car when I was 18, if I had taken the chances I was too afraid to take. Unfortunately time travel is not a real form of transportation, as much as I wish it was. So, I am living the life I have, and dealing the decisions I have made. If I could write a letter to me, this is what I would like to say to myself.
It’s future you. I know, it’s crazy, but just hear me out. I have to tell you a few things; things you’re going to want to know now instead of later.
First things first, spend more time having fun with your family instead of fighting all of the time. It is not worth it, however important it feels in the moment, I promise you, it wont matter in the future. Remember that mom and dad are getting older as you get older, so don’t take them for granted.
Keep focused with school! The world doesn’t care about you if you don’t have your degree. It’s boring, and it’s hard, and algebra sucks, but do it anyways. One day you’re going to be happy that you were home schooled. It honestly pays off, trust me.
Don’t listen to the mean girls. One day you’re going to find people who accept you, and love you for who you are. They’ll even find your bad jokes funny! Hard to believe, but it’s the truth. It will hurt for a little while, but the sooner you realize that people are going to come in and out of your life the easier it will be. Some people are not meant to be around forever, so appreciate them while they are. Learn what you can from the situation, and try to use it to your advantage in the future.
Please stop trusting that people always have your back; because they don’t. YOU NEED TO PROTECT YOURSELF! People are always looking out for themselves, and they will trample you if necessary to get what they want. Stop believing all of their empty promises, and kick ass to get what you want. Take responsibility for not getting what you want, because at the end of the day, nobody cares. It’s harsh, but it’s reality.
You do not need a boyfriend to feel good about yourself. I am still finding this out, but maybe this will give you head start. Just because other girls your age have boyfriends, it does not mean you also need to have one. I mean just look at all the problems it will cause them… You are beautiful, and you don’t need a boy to tell you that.
Remember to be happy. Find the little things that make you smile, and hold them close to your heart. It is easy to focus on all of the things that are going wrong. Instead try to remember that everything happens for a reason, as cheesy as that may be; I’ve found it to be true for the most part. There are a few things that I cannot make sense of, but I am sure that I will one day.
I cannot wait until you get to see the things I have so far in life. There are a lot of really great things mixed in with the bad. Remember that through all of the trials of life, you are becoming a stronger person in spite of it. Keep your head up, and try not to let all of those thoughts in your head control you.